Therapist Advises Against Telling Angry Kids to Take a Deep Breath

A therapist is encouraging parents to reconsider the common advice of telling their children to "take a deep breath" during moments of anger or tantrums. Instead, Dr Jazmine McCoy, also known as The Mom Psychologist, shared a video on Instagram, emphasizing the importance of self-initiated coping skills.

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According to Dr McCoy, forcing children to perform coping techniques can make them feel controlled and may lead to more explosive outbursts. She suggests that parents replace the directive to "take a deep breath" with a more empathetic approach.

Dr McCoy recommends saying something like, "We're having a difficult moment. I'm going to take a deep breath to calm my body down," while demonstrating deep breaths themselves. The hope is that children will follow suit voluntarily rather than feeling coerced into it.

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Experts agree that modeling coping mechanisms is more effective than simply instructing children what to do. By showing children how to manage their emotions, parents are providing a non-pressured way for children to learn and apply these techniques.

Parents have responded positively to Dr McCoy's advice, recognizing the negative impact of demanding deep breaths and appreciating the alternative approach. By avoiding invalidating their children's feelings, parents are fostering a healthier emotional environment.

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One parent expressed gratitude, mentioning previous struggles with the traditional approach and the immediate improvement seen after implementing Dr McCoy's suggestion. Others echoed similar sentiments, calling the advice "life-changing" and expressing optimism about their children's response.